Mother and child (stock image)
Things Fall Apart is a classic book by Chinua Achebe that explores traditional African culture from a native’s point of view. The protagonist, Okonkwo, is depicted as a strong man, yet Achebe constantly shows Okonkwo’s weaknesses and faults throughout the book.
In Chapters 14 to 16, Okonkwo is banished to his motherland after accidentally killing a teenager, and he does not take this well. During this time, he behaves lazily, his exile making him depressed. Seeing this, Okonkwo’s uncle, Uchendu, decides to teach Okonkwo a valuable lesson about respect for the motherland.
Uchendu states that a mother accepts and defends her child when it seeks refuge, even when nobody else will. In a world that disrespects women, this lesson still applies.
Although women in Things Fall Apart are often depicted as oppressed, Okonkwo’s experience in his motherland shows their importance and role. Uchendu’s lesson further explains the bond between mother and child, while also reminding Okonkwo that he should not disrespect his family and land with his ignorance. This lecture leads to Okonkwo understanding and reflecting on his actions, no longer neglecting his own wives and children.
The bond between mother and child is one of the deepest connections humans experience. It begins before birth and grows through touch, voice, and protection. A mother often becomes a child’s first sense of safety, teaching them how to trust the world while always being a place where they can return. That bond stretches and changes, but it rarely breaks, rooted in love that is fierce and gentle at the same time.
Despite Okonkwo’s mother no longer being here, her family still shows Okonkwo this type of love. While in exile, they treat him with much more compassion than he expected. Though his banishment is shameful, they do not mock or reject him. Instead, Uchendu and the rest of his kinsmen provide Okonkwo with land to farm, help him build huts, and support him in starting over. While Okonkwo feels humiliated, his family responds with patience, generosity, and emotional wisdom, showing that maternal bonds are focused on mercy and care rather than pride or judgment.
Earlier, in Chapter 11, Okonkwo’s third wife Ekwefi and their daughter Ezinma also demonstrate this bond. When Ezinma is taken by the priestess Chielo, Ekwefi’s reaction shows the depth of maternal love. Despite warnings to not follow, Ekwefi trails Chielo through the dark forest knowing it could be dangerous or seen as disrespectful to the gods. Ekwefi has endured deep pain. Before Ezinma, she lost nine of her children, mostly in infancy. This makes Ekwefi emotionally scarred, but incredibly resilient. After Ezinma’s kidnapping, Ekwefi is driven not by defiance, but by fear and true devotion to her only surviving child. Having lost many children, Ekwefi refuses to risk failing another.
Unlike many women in Umuofia, the village Things Fall Apart is set in, Ekwefi openly questions things. She speaks her mind and doesn’t silently accept suffering.
Much like humans, all animals exemplify the extent of motherly love. Throughout nature, maternal love and protection appear in strong and sometimes dangerous ways. Mother elephants form protective circles around their calves when predators approach, while grizzly bear mothers are known to fiercely confront threats to defend their cubs. Even smaller animals, like birds, will fake injury to lure predators away from their nests, risking their own safety to protect their children.
These behaviors show that maternal instinct often overrides fear and self-preservation, prioritizing the survival of offspring.
Mothers are vital to children’s survival and proper development. Okonkwo’s banishment was important because he would have not learned this lesson otherwise. He would not have understood the importance of a mother.
Mothers, and all women around the world, should be celebrated more. Without them, all of humankind wouldn’t be here today.
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